Richmond, Virginia (2009)

We had just returned from La Habana in time for my 20th High School reunion.

I’d gone to the 10th and it was a complete shitshow.

During this one, I knew I’d settle old accounts and that would be the last one I ever went to.

I decided to invite some of the teachers who were the most influential to me, including the head coach of the wrestling team and his assistant coach who was an old hippie who once showed a bunch of impressionable 17 year olds “A Clockwork Orange” without any warning or explanation whatsever.

We were wrestling Regionals at Freeman and his house was a short walk away. We were chilling in his living room with his common law wife and he said to all of us, “Now, here’s an interesting movie…”

I still remember the moment after Alex has almost beaten a man to death and raped his wife in front of him and I shot up off the couch and blurted, “What the fuck is this?!?”

Coach K. just chuckled.

“The Graduate”

“Webb may have put himself into his hero, but Webb’s novel remains surprisingly vague about what’s eating this very privileged young man. This vagueness has turned out to be an unlikely advantage: In both book and film, the root source of Benjamin Braddock’s discontent remains so elusive that whole generations swear The Graduate reflects their personal tale of woe.”

“Planet Caravan”

“Black Sabbath’s Geezer Butler, who composed the song’s lyrics, has stated that the song is about floating through the universe with one’s lover. Black Sabbath lead vocalist Ozzy Osbourne uses a Leslie speaker to achieve the vocals’ treble and vibration effects. Iommi overdubbed flute to the reversed multitrack master which was then re-forwarded and treated with stereo delay.

On 31 May 2020, “Planet Caravan” was selected by SpaceX as the wake-up music for the crew of a SpaceX Crew Dragon prior to the craft’s launch later that day. It represented the first time astronauts have received a musical wake-up since the final shuttle mission in July 2011. The craft was bound for the International Space Station.”

“1952 Vincent Black Lightning”

“1952 Vincent Black Lightning” is a song by guitarist Richard Thompson from his 1991 album Rumor and Sigh. It tells the story of a thief named James and the girl Red Molly whom he charms with a ride on his 1952 Vincent Black Lightning motorcycle.

In 2011 Time magazine listed the song in its “All TIME 100 Songs”, a list of “the most extraordinary English-language popular recordings since the beginning of TIME magazine in 1923,” praising it as “a glorious example of what one guy can accomplish with just a guitar, a voice, an imagination and a set of astonishingly nimble fingers.”

Powhatan, Virginia (2013)

My FIL had an old friend who’d made a killing running a waste disposal company before the big conglomerates took over and he had a bunch of property out in the country.

We got ourselves invited out there and I brought a small arsenal as I’d heard he had places where we could shoot.

While my FIL, Matthew, and his friend sat and watched, I fired round after round downrange.

It was one of the most enjoyable shooting experiences of my life.

I later let Matthew (age 12) shoot slugs through my Kel-Tec KSG and it almost took his shoulder off.

Vienna, Virginia (2010)

We were lucky enough (and finally affluent enough to afford tickets and get a babysitter) to see Chris Isaak at Wolf Trap one Summer night way back when.

Ever since I read a magazine article about him in 1993 and found out he was not only a singer with a magnificent hairstyle but a former boxer as well, I’ve had a bit of a man-crush on him.

The Paperweight Of Cthulhu

Blacksburg, Virgnia (1989)

This was my one contribution to my freshman dorm room in Major Bill – a brand new 24″ Sanyo television. Cost me about $200, which was a lot of money back then.

Being a Sophomore and desiring to stay in the same room he’d lived in the previous year, my first VT roommate, New Mal (who was from Yorktown), told me he’d bring the rest of the gear we’d need including shelves, VHS player, fan, speakers, and stereo system.

We had the best stereo system in the entire dorm. It was completely deafening.

You’ve never heard Tom Petty’s “Full Moon Fever” until you’ve heard it through New Mal’s stereo.

His musical system was a reflection of his personality.

Loud, fast, and in your face.

He drove a 1985 canary yellow Mazda RX-7. On two occasions he drove me home to Richmond.

We hit the exchange between I-81 and I-64 near Staunton going over 100 mph.

I hated him.

I couldn’t wait to get away.

I eventually reconciled with him 20+ years later and now we’re cool. But back then I couldn’t stand him.

To put it mildly, he was A BIT TOO MUCH.

The white telephone came with the room. (Remember those?)

Oh, yeah. Those light blue milk crates were mine, too. Still have one. I use it to collect firewood for Cub Scout camping.

Vienna, Virginia (2006)

In our computer room / library / kids play area. Representing VB.

When we were young and poor, we enjoyed eating there. Thought it was quite fancy.

In retrospect, it was cheap crap.

This is before my goatee got seriously out of control.

A Pound Of Flesh

From “The Daily Stoic”:

“They screwed you over. Hurt your career. They disrespected you. They blew it. They did… whatever.

Now, you want your revenge. You want them to suffer as you suffered. You want them to know, to feel, the same thing that you’re feeling. The Stoics talk about justice, so that’s OK, right? They shouldn’t be able to get away with this!

Remember: in 175 CE Marcus Aurelius was betrayed by his most trusted general, Avidius Cassius, in an attempted coup. Marcus could have been angry. He could have demanded all the sadistic revenge possible to a man of his unlimited power. Yet we know from the historians that he handled even this moment with grace and understanding. In fact, he wept when he was deprived of the chance to grant clemency to his former enemy.

“The best revenge,” Marcus would write in Meditations, “is to not be like that.” When he found himself getting pissed off by something someone had done, he urged himself to think about the wrong that he had done to others. He tried to practice forgiveness, or when that was beyond him, at least indifference or tolerance.

We have to accept that we cannot get even. That it’s an extra injury to ourselves to lower ourselves to the kind of cruelty, or stupidity of our opponents. They may steal from us… but we ought not steal time from ourselves stewing about them, or worse. There is no pound of flesh that will make us feel better. Only we can make ourselves feel good again—by focusing on what we have to be grateful for, by being good to others, by moving on.”